You can enjoy anal sex without pain, but it’s important to follow certain tips. For one thing, lube is key. Your anus doesn’t produce as much lubrication as your vagina does, so not using lube can lead to painful friction.
Also, start slow and use lots of foreplay. This helps the muscles in your anus relax and opens them up for the penis.
1. Go Slowly
The biggest tip for anal is to start slow and go only as far as you and your partner are comfortable. This helps to reduce the pain of anal sex and allows your muscles and sphincter to relax before anything goes up there. It also makes for a more pleasant experience overall since you’ll be more relaxed and less anxious.
The bottom area isn’t used to having a penis inside of it, so it can feel weird at first, and that discomfort might be enough to put you off of anal play altogether. The key is to use lubrication and go slowly so you don’t get too uncomfortable. And remember, if it hurts, stop immediately. Pain is your body’s way of telling you something isn’t right, so it shouldn’t be ignored.
Using anal lubricants and going slow will help your muscles and sphincter relax so that you can have anal sex without any pain at all. It’s also important to communicate with your partner during anal play. Talk about your likes and dislikes, check in about pressure and sensations, and be sure to discuss protection against STIs.
It’s also a good idea to try different angles and lubricants when you’re exploring anal for the first time. You might find that certain products work better than others to make your anal feel smooth and pleasurable.
2. Lubricate
The anus isn’t able to produce its own lubrication, so lube is a must for pain-free anal play. Make sure to use plenty of lube, especially if you and your partner are new to anal sex. It’s also a good idea to use lube that is specifically formulated for anal sex, which will be extra slippery and safe (avoid oil-based lube with latex condoms).
If you’re feeling an uncomfortable sensation while playing anal, try pushing out like you were about to poop (it might sound gross but it actually helps). This technique relaxes the sphincter muscle and can help alleviate discomfort. It’s also a good idea for both partners to communicate throughout the anal session. It’s important to let your partner know how you’re feeling, what sex positions are most comfortable for you, and any safe words you want to establish before you begin.
It’s also a good idea to switch to vaginal and oral sex for awhile after you’ve done anal sex. This will help the area recover and avoid any potential infections or injuries that can happen while exploring anal sex. Finally, don’t be afraid to stop anal sex if it becomes painful. Sex should always be pleasurable, and you should stop any activity that makes you feel uncomfortable. It’s better to stop earlier than later so you can both rest and feel comfortable again.
3. Relax
Anal sex is uncomfortable at first, but once the muscles get relaxed, it’s not so bad. Most pain is caused by tension, so if you’re both calm and relaxed, the experience should be good. Warming up with foreplay and anal masturbation will help the area relax, as will a shower or bath. You’ll also want to be sure you’re wearing a condom, as anal penetration can open up the gateway to an assortment of sexually transmitted diseases (STIs) like gonorrhea and chlamydia. If you’re not, be sure to talk about it with your partner before starting. They will appreciate the heads up and it will make them feel more confident about the situation as well.
4. Let Your Partner Know
There are a lot of reasons anal sex can hurt. It’s important to start slow, use plenty of lube, and relax. You should also let your partner know how you’re feeling, and stop if anything hurts or isn’t enjoyable. And if you’re exploring anal play with someone new, make sure to set some boundaries and talk about it before you start. And always use condoms during anal sex — unprotected anal sex is high risk for sexually transmitted infections, including gonorrhea, chlamydia, herpes, and HIV.
Some people have pain during anal sex because of a medical condition like endometriosis or painful bladder syndrome. These conditions can cause the muscles in the pelvic floor and anal canal to tighten, causing friction and pain during penetration.
Other times, pain during anal sex can be caused by trying to use something too big or hard. To avoid this, try experimenting with rimming, fingering, and vibrators outside of the anus before you try anal play. Then slowly work your way up to using a penis or sex toy inside your bum cheeks and anus. Remember to go slow and communicate with your partner, and to check in often about pressure, sensations, and discomfort. This will help everyone have a more comfortable and enjoyable anal experience!
