The Best Bed Height For Sex – How Your Mattress Can Affect Your Sex Life

white and black bed linen

We spend a big portion of our lives in bed, so it makes sense that we’d want ours to be comfortable. But did you know that your mattress can also affect your sex life?

A soft mattress may cause you to sink in too deeply, causing imbalance during positions such as missionary and doggy style. A firmer one, on the other hand, can create a bouncy feel that enhances rhythm and movement.

Height of the Bed Frame

The height of the bed frame, along with the height of the mattress and box spring (if you use one), has a huge impact on how well sex is possible in bed. For most adults, the optimal height is somewhere between 16 inches and 24 inches off of the floor.

The exact height will vary from person to person, and is determined by your personal preferences and the overall structure of your body. A taller person will need a higher bed while a shorter individual may want something lower.

A few other factors that play a role in bed height include age, health issues, and bedroom aesthetics. An older person may find that a high bed is difficult to get into and out of because it requires jumping or hoisting. In addition, a high bed can be dangerous for older individuals who could fall off of it.

To test if your current bed is the right height, simply sit on the edge of the mattress and see where your feet fall. If they are on the floor, then your bed is the right height. If they are below your hips, then it is too tall. If they are above your hips, then it is too low. You are looking for that Goldilocks position where your feet are planted and your hips are aligned with your knees.

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Height of the Mattress

The mattress is one of the most important components to consider when selecting the best bed height for sex. It should be a medium to firm mattress, so that the weight of both partners is evenly distributed during sex. Soft mattresses can sink in and make it difficult to maneuver into a favorite position or change positions mid-session.

A mattress should also be easy to move around on, so that couples can access the entire playing surface of the bed. Mattresses with good edge support are also a plus, as they can help prevent someone from accidentally falling or rolling off the bed during a lovemaking session. Natural latex mattresses tend to provide the most durable edge support, as they don’t compress or develop a deep gulley over time like petroleum based polyurethane foam beds can.

If possible, a low-to-the-ground mattress is ideal for lovers with tall ceilings or who don’t want to risk hitting their heads on the ceiling during sexual intercourse. A low bed is also easier for children to climb on, as it doesn’t have quite as much vertical distance to fall from. Finally, a low-to-the-ground bed is less likely to sway like a tall skyscraper during gusty weather, making it easier to stay stable while dancing or rocking during a sexual encounter. If a lower-to-the-ground mattress isn’t an option, a sturdy box spring or air chamber mattress will offer plenty of support without reducing the amount of play space on the bed.

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Height of the Box Spring

The ideal bed height for sex depends on your personal preference and the size of your mattress. Generally, you want the base of your spine to be about 18’’ to 24’’ off the floor when sitting on the edge of the bed. This will reduce pressure on your legs and back while giving you enough room to move around in bed.

A traditional box spring is typically about 9 inches tall, which can accommodate mattresses up to 14 inches thick. However, you can also find low profile box springs that are thinner than this. These are usually four or five inches tall and work well for most people.

If you are using a memory foam or latex mattress, you might need to place a nonslip mat between the box spring and the mattress. This will create traction to prevent the mattress from sliding and falling off of the frame during sex.

If you want the best possible comfort, try a high-density foam mattress like natural latex. This material is extremely durable and won’t compress or develop a gulley in the center of the bed as many petroleum-based polyurethane foam mattresses are prone to do. In addition, it is very lightweight and easy to move around on. This makes it ideal for a platform bed. This style of bed is also super low to the ground and sits on ultra-short wooden legs, so it is less likely to squeak or break during sex.

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Height of the Headboard

Many people choose to frame their beds with a headboard, and the height of that headboard can make a difference when it comes to sex. If the headboard is too high, it will look awkward, and it won’t give you enough vertical space to sit comfortably. But if it’s too low, you might have trouble getting on and off the bed.

Pim and Lore recommend choosing a headboard that’s 60-80cm above the mattress or slightly higher. This is usually enough to give you some slack to hang onto when getting off the bed, and it also gives you something to lean against when riding your partner or sitting up against the wall for fucking.

Another factor to consider is whether you’re going with a solid-wood or metal bed frame. Both can be quiet, but solid-wood frames tend to squeak less than metal ones. The struts and bolts of metal beds can rattle during sex, which isn’t ideal for anyone who needs to focus on getting their partner hard.

If you want to eliminate squeaking completely, opt for an air chamber or natural latex mattress. Both can offer some great bounce and support, which is important for sex. They also won’t compress, mash down or develop gulleys like petroleum-based polyurethane foam beds can. This is an excellent option for couples who want to be able to move around the bed with ease and without fear of ripping off sheets or making a mess.

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